| Holy shit! It's been 79 weeks since my last update! |
[Dec. 2nd, 2007|02:56 am] |
Hey gang! Barry Not here! I've been rather busy with my lady friend Kate Moss, so haven't been able to come back here for a while, but we were having some relationship issues (I punched her in the tit), and we've broken up!
Anyway, the reason I'm back is because a rather good friend of mine, The Direct-Whore, did a rather amusing Q&A thing where you put the answer to the question into a Google image search and post that instead! Prepare yourselves for lots of rape and AIDS!
1. Age you'll be on your next birthday
2. A place you'd like to travel
3. Your favourite place
4. Your favourite object
5. Favourite food
6. Favourite animal
7. Favourite colour
Pink is my favourite colour because she looks like she would let me fuck her up the bum!
8. Town where you were born
9. Town where you live
10. Name of a past pet
11. Your nickname/screenname
No pictures of me (for shame, Google) so I went with this chick!
12. Your first name
13. Your middle name
My middle name revealed, gang - I have none!
14. Your last name
15. A bad habit of yours
I just can't get enough of ironing, folks!
16. Your first job
17. Your grandmother's name
19. Your major in college
Well, there you go gang! Hopefully you all know a little bit more about me, and what I like to do! Must go though, Kate's banging on the door begging me to come back to her! I'll "come" back, if you know what I mean! Cheerio, folks! |
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| I've been tagged! By an absolute cunt! |
[May. 25th, 2006|02:04 am] |
That cunt Adam just tagged me to do this, but since he did pull me out of the fire Elizabeth Hurley started when I kicked her in the minge, I kinda owe him.
Weird habits you have/things you do:
Once you are tagged you MUST write an entry about 6 weird habits/things as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose the next six people to be tagged and list their names.
1. Rape!
I just love rape, whether I be the raper or the rapee! It's just so much fun, looking on into a woman's face as she screams for help!
2. Pillaging!
Just like the viking cleaners before me, I love my rape with a side order of pillaging! So far I have a 50 inch HDTV, 5 iPods, a new Merc and a rather lovely dining table. All taken from Barry Scott's house!
3. Filth!
That's right folks, Barry Not loves a filthy house! Without dirt and grime about the place I'd have no excuse to clean with Kill It BAM!
4. Innuendo? In YOUR endo!
I can (and will) turn anything into an innuendo! For example, today I was sat next to 2 ladies, and one of them said "ooh, I've got an itch in my pants", and I said "you've also got a vagina in your pants!" Oh, how I laughed!
5. Eating seals!
It's the blubbery treat I just can't get enough of! I just love biting into it's big fat ass, and slurping it all down koala bear brain juice! Yum yum!
6. Your mum!
She's pure filth, and that's why I love her!
I tag the following people: kate_moss, barryscotts_wife, liz_hurley, your_mum, mrsheen and cunt_face24 |
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| Hey gang, sorry I've not updated for a while! |
[Feb. 16th, 2006|02:00 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  happy | ] |
I've been very busy the last couple of months! I've been drinking, shagging and starting fights like a crazed Welshman! But I'm back now, and loving it!
Valentine's Day was awesome! Kate came over, and we set fire to chimpanzees, before throwing them of the roof of the Radio City tower! Much fun was had by all, especially when all the naked PETA members came, and I had my filthy way with every last one of them! My balls are itchy now though, think I might have caught fleas of one of them animal loving cunts.
Anyway, must go gang! Have to appear in court tomorrow morning, for slaughtering monkeys or something. But don't forget kids: rape and pillage all you can, because everybody loves a viking! |
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| Well, that was quick! |
[Dec. 8th, 2005|03:52 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  blank | ] |
Unfortunately, I have a problem with premature ejaculation. It seems that, unfortunately, it never happens, and Kate gets fed up of waiting for me to jizz on her tits. Oh well. I'm back, baby, and loving it! |
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| Barry Scott can suck my cock! |
[Dec. 8th, 2005|03:31 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | satisfied | ] |
Hi kids! Your friend Barry here! The real Barry, that is! That other prick is just an impostor! With a shit cleaning product! And a shit wife! But more on that later...
Actually, I'll tell you about it now. He was shagging that bird Kate Moss! Until I came along, that is! Now he's with Jade Goody, and has a mortgage! I still live with my student buddies! Cheap alternatives for the win, eh?
Today, I've been testing Bounty versus a cheap alternative! You can see more about it here! http://www.livejournal.com/users/maryboneproject. Bounty is clearly the superior cleaning product! But not as good as Kill it BAM, obviously! It's so good, I'd put my name on it! Except they won't let me... Fucksocks. They are giving me free stuff for all of my hard work though. More on that another time.
Anyway, have to go. Kate just rang. She's off her face on coke AGAIN, and wants a filthy threesome with that Claudia Schiffer bird. Toodlepipsky! |
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